How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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