He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
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