Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize