Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
