He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
