Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize