Pappa wants mamma naked
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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