His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
