we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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