Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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