Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
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That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
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I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
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