Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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