My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
