just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
