I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
