omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
