I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
