i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
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