my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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