I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
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Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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