Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
