He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
