Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
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We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
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Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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