I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Randomize
