He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
