Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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