Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
