if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
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