There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
