Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
