he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
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