There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
