Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
