She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
