is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
