I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
handjob tips. give me some.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
