i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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