hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
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When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
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I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
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