We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Randomize
