No awkward lesbian experiences without me
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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