she looked like the before picture.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
