I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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