Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
