why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
