I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
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i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
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I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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