I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
