i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
