Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
