You just made me feel so damn special
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
