I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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